First Day DBA: Harsh Truths

Thomas LaRock (absolute legend) presents some harsh truths that any Graduate/Junior DBA must accept if they are to succeed as a Default Blame Acceptor…

First off, let’s get some basics out of the way. You do not know everything. Sorry to tell you, but better to find out now rather than later on. Trust me. No one person knows everything; it is a fact of human existence. You are human, right? Because that simple fact will be questioned periodically, so you better check again just to make certain. Last thing you want is to find out you are actually a Cylon or something worse.

Another thing you need to know about being a DBA is that you will have fewer friends at work than when you started. Now, that is not necessarily a bad thing. See, you have been placed into a position of responsibility, and with this responsibility you will need to make some decisions, and those decisions will not always be popular. Thus, you may lose some friends at work, but these losses will be more than offset by the gains you have in the overall DBA community. So you have that going for you, which is nice.

With that responsibility, you will also find that you start getting more blame than credit for your work. I promise you this: no one will ever stop by your desk in the morning and thank you for the fact that everything ran smoothly last night. But you better believe if a batch load took five minutes longer than expected, you will have four different people asking you “WTF?”

Based on my first three months as a Graduate DBA, these harsh truths are totally accurate. But ask any DBA if they would have it any other way 🙂

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